The fallacy of the creationist distinction between micro- and macroevolution

Why Evolution Is True

I’ve belabored this issue before, but there’s always a new crop of readers who might need a lesson. I’m talking about a common creationist trope: the claim that microevolution can occur, usually defined as “evolution within a species” or “evolution within a kind” (whatever a “kind” is), but that macroevolution—seen as a transition from one “kind” to another—doesn’t occur. So antibiotic resistance in a bacterial species, or a change in coat color of a mouse, is fine, because that’s just “microevolutionary change”. Ditto with the evolution of different species of cats, which is simply microevolution within the “cat kind.” And ditto for the creation of different breeds of dogs by artificial selection: breeds so different that, if they were found as fossil skeletons, some would be seen not just as different species, but as different genera. Nevertheless, creationist see that as simply change within the canid “kind”, so that artificial…

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Latest Reports Reveal Russian Ambassador Showered Sessions With Gifts

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WASHINGTON – The Washington Post is reporting that after meetings with then Senator Jeff Sessions last summer, Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak showered the Trump surrogate with expensive gifts in an apparent attempt to curry favor with the Trump Campaign and potential 45th President of the United States.

According to the article in the Post, the gifts included but were not limited to an expensive top-of-the-line tricycle, a large jungle gym playset, an extra small Confederate uniform with a miniature battle flag, and a Shetland pony.

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According to the article in the Post, the gifts included an expensive tricycle and deluxe jungle gym for Sessions’ plantation in Alabama.

The article claims that Sessions did not report the gifts and should never have accepted them in the first place.

“If this is true Attorney General Sessions is in violation of senate rules,” said Johnny Isakson (R-GA), Chairman of the Senate Ethics Committee. “This is very serious.”

When reached for comment about the allegations, Attorney General Sessions denied that he had received any gifts from any Russian official, and had in fact never spoken to the Russian ambassador in his life.

“I wouldn’t recognize the Russian ambassador if I looked up at him from a foot away,” said the diminutive racist from Alabama.

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After Sessions denied the allegations made in the article, the Post published photographs of the Attorney General riding his new pony on a farm in Maryland.

“In fact, I’ve never spoken to anyone from Russia at all. I can’t even tell you where Russia is. I know Sarah Palin knows where it is; why don’t you go ask her about the Russian ambassador.”

Despite his denials, the Post is standing by its story, and released photographs of Sessions riding his new pony on a farm belonging to a Republican state senator from Maryland. There were also photos of the attorney general playing on his jungle gym with friends and riding his tricycle on the sidewalk outside a bar in Georgetown.

At a hurriedly called press conference this morning, Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer called for Sessions to resign.

“I don’t care how much fun the Attorney General is having with his new toys,” said a visibly irritated Schumer, “it’s his duty as an American citizen to resign and return those gifts.”

So far there has been no response from the Trump Administration to the disturbing new revelations.

White House Press Secretary Sean Sphincter told reporters that the President was far too busy finalizing plans to nuke Pyongyang to worry about any fucking Shetland ponies.

 

The Killings Times’ Quite Large 2017 Crime Drama Preview

The Killing Times

First LookRight, it’s back to business. We’ve had Sherlock to kick 2017 off in big, thrillery style and this week is jam-packed full of new crime dramas. But it’s not just this week that’s jam-packed with stuff, oh no. The whole bloody year looks as though it’ll be rammed with crime drama. So I’ve scoured the internet and asked some of my contacts for the lowdown on what we can expect. And what can we expect? Lots and lots and lots. You’ll find over 30 crime dramas over the jump, some with estimated transmission dates (don’t hold me to many of them, please) and the one thing you can say about 2017 is that there will be some HUGE – some of the genre’s real big hitters – making a return. Strap yourselves in because you may as well sack off family, friends any kind f social life you had planned.

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Fargo announces April transmission date; Channel 4 onboard for UK

The Killing Times

c5s42kzxaaqjzvbAs long-time readers of the site will know, Fargo is one of my favourite series. With Noah Hawley and a cast that includes Ewan McGregor (in two roles), David Thewlis, Carrie Coon and Mary Elizabeth Wanstead series three is really starting to gear up. It usually transmits around the end of the year, but this time around FX (the show’s US network) sprung a surprise yesterday – series three will air in the spring. This spring.

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CPAC Rejects Trickle-Down Theory of Sexuality

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WASHINGTON – So far it hasn’t been such a good week for slimy pedophile cretin, Clorox victim, and vile swamp thing Milo Yiannopoulos.

On Monday, the organizers of the Conservative Political Action Conference rescinded their invitation for him to be their keynote speaker at their annual hatefest taking place at Gaylord National Resort and Convention Center in National Harbor, Maryland. Simon & Schuster said it was canceling publication of “Dangerous” after standing by him through weeks of criticism of the deal. And Breitbart itself was reportedly reconsidering his role amid calls online for it to sever ties with him.

The polemical Breitbart editor and unapologetic defender of the alt-right, tested the limits of how far his provocations could go after the publication of a video in which he condones sexual relations with boys as young as 13 and laughs off the seriousness of pedophilia by Roman Catholic priests.

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Mr. Schlapp told reporters that Mr. Yiannapoulos’ views regarding sex with minors were unacceptable, at least when they were voiced in public. Schlapp said that CPAC would seek a replacement speaker who was more in line with mainstream conservative values.

“We initially extended the invitation knowing that the free speech issue on college campuses is a battlefield where we need brave, conservative standard-bearers,” Matt Schlapp, the chairman of the American Conservative Union, said in a written statement. “Normally we are proud to have Nazis, fake Christians, and other deplorable motherfuckers speak to us at CPAC; it gets us horny and ready for a night on the town in some of D.C.’s best brothels.

“However, as cute as he is, Milo went a little too far this time. Having sex with underage boys and girls is fine with us as is other deviant behavior, as long as it’s kept secret. When you come out into the open about this stuff it can be problematic,” said the hypocritical asshole.

“I don’t want anyone to worry,” continued a profusely sweating Schlapp. “CPAC is proud to have had some of the most hypocritical ministers, sociopathic politicians, and other subhuman monsters of the right wing speak at our convention, and trust me, this year will be no exception.”

Mr. Schlapp told reporters that the ACU had reached out to Rocky Suhayda, leader of the American Nazi Party, and David Duke to see if either one of them could take Yiannopoulos’ place as keynote speaker.

As of noon today Yiannopoulos was unavailable for comment regarding his sudden fall from grace. Sources tell the Times-Picayune that he is on holiday with Ann Coulter torturing small animals in a wildlife preserve just across the Mexican border.

 

 

Weather Channel Hopeful Body Count Will Rise For Winter Storm Niko

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ATLANTA – Anchors at the Weather Channel are warning that thousands could still die as the result of Winter Storm Niko which is currently pounding the northeast.

Reporting from Pawtucket, Rhode Island, an area that was not getting any fucking snow at all at the time, anchor and Weather Channel resident lunatic Jim Cantore gleefully pointed out that thousands of people have been stranded by canceled flights, leaving them susceptible to frostbite, hypothermia, or instant death from the large number of lightning strikes accompanying this storm.

Weather Channel meteorologist Jim Cantore gets the scoop.

Although considered profoundly unhinged by many of his co-workers, a judge has determined that Cantore poses no threat to himself or others

“Just look at Connecticut! It’s saturated with lightning strikes! And there’s more to come!” yelled a maniacal Cantore, while pointing a three iron at the sky to emphasize his point.

Cantore advised everyone within 500 miles of New York city to cower indoors like rats in a burrow in order to avoid the elements and extend their lives for a few precious hours.

He advised residents of Manhattan to seek shelter in outdated, vermin-infested 1950’s era fallout shelters deep below ground.

“The worst is yet to come,” said a smiling Cantore, doing his best impression of the Abominable Dr. Phibes.

“I feel certain that we’re going to see the body count rise on this one.”