CHARLESTON, S.C. – (CT&P) – Infamous South Carolina dickhead congressman Mark Sanford posed for a photograph with bigoted pseudo Christian asshole Phil Robertson at a campaign event for Antichrist miscreant Senator Ted Cruz last night, who continues to fantasize about being president of the United States.
Mr. Sanford posted the photograph on Twitter with the caption, “I love getting to know scumbag cretins like myself. Phil is a good Christian who wants to kill all gay people. Go Ted!”
Pundits are calling the photograph a warning to all citizens of the United States of what could happen if a Republican wins the White House, particularly the giant bipedal penis Ted Cruz.
“It never ceases to amaze me that people are dumb enough to actually sit and listen to a couple of fossilized turds like Sanford and Robertson,” said Sheldon Schlongowitz, a political analyst for CNN.
“It’s truly worrisome that Republican voters in are apparently splitting their vote between an ego-maniacal fascist and a foul smelling hypocrite who wants to turn America into some sort of theocracy, but then again we are talking about South Carolina.”
Democrats are hopeful that the photograph will scare the fuck out of decent people across the U.S. and help them win the general election in the fall.
“If that photograph doesn’t convince the American public that electing a Republican president is tantamount to suicide, then nothing will,” said Bernie Sanders’ campaign manager Jeff Weaver.